Breaking the Silence

Sorry for the long silence. I have thought many times about sitting down to write, but really haven't had much to say. Well, that is not really true. There is always lots to say, but so often it is the same old, same old. We continue with our daily ups and downs. Spring is in the air and with it the mania that typically accompanies it.

We are fast approaching the one year anniversary of Mary's first inpatient hospital stay. I have to confess that the date looms huge in my head. As the day gets closer, I find myself comparing this year to last year and previous years before that. I find myself fully prepared to have to do it again, and yet praying that we don't get to that point.

Overall this year is much different than last year. I think we have a better grip on the cycling with her current medications, and that a year of maturity makes a huge difference in Mary's ability to cope. But I am also aware that while she is a very "happy manic" right now, that can change in an instant.

There is also the need to have blood work done... it has been six months since her levels were checked last (during her second inpatient hospital stay) and it really needs to be done again. Of course her reaction to that was "absolutely no way, not doing it!" After that she proceeded to tell the pdoc that she is the worst doctor ever and then went to hide on the couch with her head buried under the cushions. She threatened to stop taking her medicines if that was the reason she has to have blood work done. The pdoc was very gracious and let her rant. When things had calmed down and we were in the car on the way home, I was not so gracious. I let her know in no uncertain terms that to stop taking her medicine without a doctor's approval and oversight would kill her. Thankfully she understands that and told me she was just frustrated and does not plan to stop taking her medicine. Phewww!

Anyway, back to the blood work... we are trying to come up with a good plan to sedate her enough not to care about having blood drawn, but not so much that it would be considered conscience sedation. We don't want her to have to spend hours being monitored at the doctor's office or take any unnecessary risks. Since sedatives make her sleepy, and we don't want her to miss school because of it, we will be having it done over a break from school or right after school lets out for the summer. In the meantime, we will try and figure out what a good dose of sedative is on an empty stomach, first thing in the morning, starting at the very lowest dose and working up slowly from there.

Mary continues to love her new school. We are so thankful for the opportunity to have her there and for all the wonderful people in the school who love her and accept her just the way she is. What a blessing from God!!! I know that having her at this school has played a huge role in helping her cope both with the death of her grandfather as well as the spring mania. There are plans to partner with a program called the Arrowsmith program next year for children with learning disabilities. If anyone has heard anything about this program, please let me know. It looks like it could potentially be a great thing for Mary.